Learning the skills that benefit your personal and professional lives

Think that what happens in the salon stays in the salon? There are certainly some skills that you use in the workplace that can benefit your whole life.

As part of the Take Control of your Career special we asked a variety of lifestyle coaches and motivational speakers to share their advice for cultivating these skills.

How to say no!

Seán Brickell

Seán is a confidence and communication speaker, trainer and coach. His book Don't Shoot - I'm Not Well! Confidence For When You Really Need It is out in February 2011.

Find out more: www.seanbrickell.com

"Saying no to someone in the emotionally and creatively charged atmosphere of the salon can be difficult.

"Most people tend to focus on what they're saying when trying to get their message across, and not how the person they're dealing with will be affected by what they say - and how they say it. This is particularly true when the pressure's on.

"Whether you have a client demanding a cut you know won't suit them, or a colleague who constantly asks you to do things you neither have the time, inclination or capacity for, you need to say no, but without upsetting them."

Here are some tips on how to say no effectively

• Ask yourself honestly whether their request is reasonable, and whether you are the right person for them to approach.
• If you are the right person, or if their request is reasonable - at least in their eyes - then use your knowledge of, or instinctive feel about, the person to judge how important their request is. The more outlandish it is, the easier it is to say no. 
• Think about how the other person will feel by your saying no. How would you feel if you were them? How would you like to be told 'no?'
• Imagine you have a look of warm and considerate empathy on your face - practise in front of the mirror. Smile gently and, softening and deepening the tone of your voice, say 'no'.
• There are various ways to say 'no' without actually using the word itself. For instance, with a client who wants a cut that you know won't suit them, you could tell them with a calm, positive and encouraging tone that you will make them look even better than they were suggesting, by doing something else.
• Look people in the eye - warmly - as it's more sincere, and shows you mean what you say with the best intentions. If you look away, then it shows weakness and suggests insincerity. This can give them hope that you might say yes, so they're more likely to persist.

How to believe in yourself

Robert Lobetta

Robert Lobetta is a hairdressing industry icon with a career spanning more than 30 years.

"You need to dig inside yourself and think 'what am I brilliant at?' That could be long hair, it could be colour, it could be customer service.

"Once you discover that, you will find your voice and fall in love with what you do. Then, always work to your strengths and forget about your weaknesses because you can't do everything.

"Once you have a specialisation, you can become an authority and over time people will come to you and want your services.

"Your intuition is valuable, so trust your instincts and you will excel."

How to make the right decisions

Jackie Arnold

Jackie is director of Coach4executives as well as an associate coach for the Leadership Foundation for Higher Education, delivering one-to-one and group coaching. Her latest book, Coaching for Leaders in the Workplace, is used as a course book for coaching and mentoring qualifications.

Find out more: www.coach4executives.com

Having the confidence to make the right decision at the right time will depend on the support you have from your team/boss. But, you can minimise the risk by giving yourself some affirmations.

Affirmations

• I generally make good decisions.
• I am a decisive person. 
• I can make this work. 
• I have all the information/facts I need to move forward.
  
  (Even if these statements are not true all the time it helps to repeat them or write your own).

The next step

• Make sure you have all the information/facts you need to make your decision - if not, ask for it confidently.
• Making a list, mind-map or spreadsheet with all the information is helpful.
• Consult with others and get their feedback if possible.
• Find a quiet space and give yourself time to think.
• Visualise yourself making the decision and getting a positive outcome.
  
  No one gets it right all the time so be prepared to learn from any less than favourable decisions.

How to give a great presentation

Debbee Dale

Debbee is a training and development expert, with extensive experience helping companies increase sales and customer retention. 

Find out more: www.debbeedale.com

"Many people are afraid of public speaking, but there are ways to overcome the fear. Whether you're presenting to one or 1,000 people, prepare these three steps: know what you're going to do; know what makes it interesting; and know why the audience needs the information you're giving them.

"Remember that your audience wants you to succeed. Whether it's a one-to-one presentation to your bank manager, or demonstrating to a large group onstage, they want to be interested - so keep them engaged. Questions and stories are great ways to open your presentation. Never open with an apology, or by telling them you're nervous. This doesn't build empathy, but instead allows them to disengage. Always show confidence, even if you have butterflies.

"Repetition is really important for getting the message across, so think of your key messages and how you can emphasise them. Blocks of three or five are far easier to remember - and take in - so whether it's your breakdown of information, number of slides, or images; remember three is the magic number.

"Think about your verbal and non-verbal communication. Silence can be really useful to get people to pay attention to what you're saying, and stops you saying 'erm' too much. Consider your pace of presentation and whether you need to speed up or slow down to get your point across.

Keep an eye on the clock; if you have a set time in which to present, stick to it.

"The power of your message can be intensified by how you deliver it, so think about body language. Be careful not to negate a positive with a shake of the head, or shrug of the shoulders, and don't hide behind a computer or notes.

"Avoid playing with your hair or glasses or rubbing your hands, as it takes the focus away from what you're saying. When it comes to concluding, end powerfully. As much as your opening is important to create a good first impression, closing well will enhance the thoughts that your audience leave with.

"Summarise; highlighting the points you need them to take away, and give the opportunity for them to a sk questions. Finally, thank them for their input, time and attendance.

"Most importantly, prepare, prepare, prepare! Practice delivering the presentation to yourself in the mirror, watching expressions, body language and timing. Be yourself and don't over analyse - you are your own worst critic." 

Other Take Control of your Career topics: How to kick-start your career |How to get more out of your job | How to add more strings to your bow

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